Joke of the day!

[ZERO25]

A man walks into a bar and sees Trump and Ted Cruz at a table. He walks up to them and says how it is such an honor to meet them. He then asks why are they sitting there:

Trump says, we are planning WW 3!
The man asks why would you do that?
Trump replies, So we can kill 140 million Muslims and one blonde with big boobs!
The man replies, why would you kill one blonde with big boobs?
Trump looks at Cruz and says.....See, I told you, no one would care about the Muslims! lololol

[Raceready]

That's so thought provoking 1 It brings back memories of 911 when somebody said " Why couldn't they have bombed all of California, Vermont, Chicago, or any one of the Liberal places so that it might make the country a more normal place to live in" .

[Raceready]

Speaking of bar jokes, I think all of the jokes about picking up an ugly woman in a bar and regretting it later when sobered. I was thinking how bad it would be to have it be old Prune Pelosi. I cant imagine ever being that awful drunk for her to look good !

[ZERO25]

Wife: I have a bag full of used clothing I'd like to donate.

Husband: Why not just throw it in the trash? That's much easier!

Wife: But there are poor starving people who can really use those clothes!

Husband: Honey, anyone who fits into your clothing, is not starving!

[ss12]

Overheard at Walter Reed:

* "No, Mr. President, we found no signs of microorganisms or inflammation. You are (not a nice word)(not a nice word)(not a nice word)(not a nice word)ting your pants purely from fear."

* "Mr. President, this is what we doctors refer to as 'Cranial Splodey Syndrome', and it results from having too many Democrats taking up free space in your head."

* "No, Mr. President, there's nothing much to worry about from your test results. You're in just as (not a nice word)(not a nice word)(not a nice word)(not a nice word)ty shape as you were before, and if your last 73 years haven't killed you, we doubt the impeachment will, either."

"Heart palpitations, headache, nausea, depression... hmmm, it sounds like you've just realized Donald J. Trump is the President of the United States."

* "Take two hamberders and tweet us in the morning."

[Barbecueboy]

That would have gotten gonged by jp Morgan after the first line.......not your best work simple Simon.

You realize that jokes are actually supposed to be funny , right?

I've got a good one......The honorable Adam schiff walks into a bar.....the end.

[Barbecueboy]

Overheard at Walter Reed:

* "No, Mr. President, we found no signs of microorganisms or inflammation. You are (not a nice word)(not a nice word)(not a nice word)(not a nice word)ting your pants purely from fear."

* "Mr. President, this is what we doctors refer to as 'Cranial Splodey Syndrome', and it results from having too many Democrats taking up free space in your head."

* "No, Mr. President, there's nothing much to worry about from your test results. You're in just as (not a nice word)(not a nice word)(not a nice word)(not a nice word)ty shape as you were before, and if your last 73 years haven't killed you, we doubt the impeachment will, either."

"Heart palpitations, headache, nausea, depression... hmmm, it sounds like you've just realized Donald J. Trump is the President of the United States."

* "Take two hamberders and tweet us in the morning."

Which one of you is the father and which one is the son ? Asking for a friend

[dirtMAN007]

which one of you is the father and which one is the son ? Asking for a friend

it all makes sense now!

[Barbecueboy]

it all makes sense now!

Yup.......but like always, I'll be incorrect

[ZERO25]

Yup.......but like always, I'll be incorrect

With Schifty Schiff 12s very failed attempt at humor, I bet his home is filled with a thimble full of laughter!

[Barbecueboy]

So what about it Dad?

[ss12]

You are wrong as usual. Keep guessing!!

[Barbecueboy]

You are wrong as usual. Keep guessing!!

Of course I am, or am I?......see post 9

[Barbecueboy]

You are wrong as usual. Keep guessing!!

^^^^^^^overheard in the private strategy meetings held by Mrs. Schiff with his colleagues every morning?

[Barbecueboy]

You are wrong as usual. Keep guessing!!

What the whole forum was trying to tell your buddies " source" about bloomquist returning " soon"?